I need.....

Entertainment for a Thursday afternoon found at Faster than Kudzu... Thanks for the fun.... Google your name and "Needs" and find out what the universe has in store for you.

*** Real name replaced by "I" - i'm not real enthused about putting my name out there for the world to see****

I need to be the center of attention (I DO need this! Pay me some attention!!)
I need a new home (Not really - I have a new home already, maybe this one is from last year)
I need some breathing room (Yes, I do need some breathing room - life is overwhelming)
I need some lyrics to go along with that wonderful music (HA HA HA I make wonderful music)
I need a 2.35 drop of empathy (I don't know how much a 2.35 drop is, but I could use some empathy)
I need to do my own thing now and SHOW people what I can do (Well, I at least need to do my own thing, I don't much care if other people know what I can do)
I need to find another payment processor (or money. Money would be good). (Oh money, money would be so so good right now)
I need to test out my new device which measures volcanic activity (This sounds like fun)
I need 300 Christmas lights with equal amounts of each of my 4 selected colors (I miss you, Christmas)

Bad! Bad! Bad!

It's been a while.

I didn't like where I was going with this. When I started, I wanted it to be funny and light and entertaining. More like me. Like me when the wierd comes out or the crazy comes around. I like that me. That me, she amuses this me.

So Hi! Welcome to "If Wishes Were Ponies....." NEW!! IMPROVED!!! (AND WITH WAY MORE CAPS LOCK AND EXCLAIMATION MARKS!!!!!!)

Also, Ponies with more spelling mistakes. Mostly because I can't spell and a little bit because I just don't feel like doing spell check.

This time 'round I'm going to make you laugh. If it kills me. And it just might.

6 Wierd Things....

Amalah tagged the whole internet to do the six wierd things meme. Hey, I'm on the internet, so I guess that means me. Now, to narrow it down to only six....

1. I often have a story going on in my head, with characters, dialogue and everything. These storys change fairly often, but while they are there, they're running all day long. (I believe that this is why I need to write a novel... the stories need to get out).

2. I get teary and emotional whenever I watch a team win a major sporting event - especially hockey. I also feel extremely sad for the losing team.

3. I am a hot sauce fanatic. The spicier the better.

4. When I wish on a star, I blow it a kiss to make the wish come true.

5. I get excited in the winter when the days get shorter, and I feel sad come spring when they start getting longer. I guess this means that I am not a fan of daylight savings time.

6. They could have based Lorelei Gilmore's character on me. I've been told by many people that it's like they took my personality and made a whole show out of it. I could only wish to look like her though.....

February 11th

I miss Papa.

Yesterday, February 11th, is the anniversary of the day he died.

It makes today hard.

Happy Birthday to Me??

Hi! It's my birthday. I am officially a 30-something today. I'm not in my 20's, I'm not the big 3-0, I'm a 30-something.

It's funny, this birthday thing. I kind of feel entitled to "Something Special" today, just because it's my birthday. It has been a nice day so far. I indulged on coffee and a muffin this morning, got taken out for nice lunch with a pizza and a marg.

But, here I am with my usual birthday conundrum. Birthday's are the one day a year that are your day. However, it seems like my birthday, to most, isn't so important. Some expect large parties and presents and special outings for their big day. I don't, I would just like to have a few friends out for dinner and a little bit of fuss made over me. For some reason it seems to be a chore to some. W. didn't even call to wish me Happy Birthday this morning, my sister doesn't really want to come for dinner tonight, my friends SO probably won't bother to show up. Yet, for all of them, I'd be the first one there.

I feel a bit spoiled, with this attitude, but hey, it is my birthday after all.

Blue...

The weather is grey and wet. The fog is laying low over everything this morning and the air has that damp cold feeling that makes it impossible to warm up.

Work is overwhelming. I'm working late most days, it's a non-stop rush to get close to anything finished. I'm stressed.

Even home feels stressful right now. W. wants to go play hockey all weekend this weekend, he wants to go to Vancouver to a hockey game and he wants to go to a tournament in a couple weeks. I hate always saying no, but when he goes places it's hard on me. I try to be trusting, but I can't. I just can't. Also, our home finances suck right now. They really do. There is nothing extra and I know that if he goes to Vancouver, it's a $500 weekend. At least.

Also, it's my birthday and I can't help but feeling unimportant and abandoned if he goes. Like I don't matter.

And one more thing. We're having his relative show up this weekend to say for a while and he's dropping that on me too.

I think I'm depressed. I'm ready for winter to be over. I'm ready for the sun to come out.

Embarrassing Weigh-In: Week #6

Date: February 8, 2007
Weight: 151.8 lbs (-1.2 lbs)

I don't understand really. This week I thought was going to be good. I figured for sure the scale would say I was down. I exercised EVERY day this week and I thought that I ate pretty good. There were a few missteps on the food end. But! I hit the gym 3 times, I played hockey 3 times and I even went riding. So how do you gain another pound back??? My clothes are fitting better - I wore a pair of jeans yesterday that I haven't dared put on in months, but the scale says I've only lost a total of 1.2 lbs. I don't get it. I just don't get it. Monday is my birthday so this week I'm going to keep exercising and not worry about the food intake so much. Next week - I guess I start a serious diet plan, rather than just the exercise. If I'm going to make my goal, I need to lost 2 lbs per week for the next 6 weeks. The first 6 weeks of this diet didn't work so good.

Embarassing Weigh-In: Week #5

Date: February 1, 2007
Weight: 150.8 (-2.2 lbs total)

* I haven't even caught back up to where I was two weeks ago, but at least I'm back on the downward slope. I think though, that all the exercise working. Things are fitting a bit looser, and I'm feeling a little more comfortable in my clothes. That's something I guess.

** This means no pictures. I think I'm scrapping the pictures until there's actually something to show. Maybe at the end if I get close to my goal.

***In order to catch up, I have to get down to 148 lbs this coming week. That's only 2.8 lbs. I have three hockey games this weekend, and if I can get in some walks or pond hockey, and the gym at least three times, maybe I can do it. The good thing is that this weekend there is no appy nights. The weekends are the killers for eating crappily.

Random

* My hands smell like cigarette smoke. I don't smoke, nor have I been near any smokers today. So why do my hands smell like that?

** The in-laws are coming over to our new house for only the 2nd (and a bit) time ever. We've lived there for 3 full months now. I wish that they were more comfortable coming by so that it doesn't have to be such a big deal. We had to do a cleaning blitz last night, and I also feel compelled to try and get them to stay for dinner.

*** I want to go riding. I want to go riding so badly that I'm avoiding my horse unless I can actually get on him. I don't want the craving to get any worse.

**** I think I'm ready for Spring now. Winter has been nice this year, snowy and pretty and wintry, but I'm ready for Spring. I feel excited for the year ahead.

***** My massage therapist has not called me back to rebook the appointment I called about first thing yesterday morning.

****** My sister bought her first apartment yesterday!!! WOOO-EEEEE!

*******I always have to come back to spell check....

Embarassing Weigh-In: Week #4

Date: January 25, 2007
Weight: 151.4 lbs (-1.6 lbs) Boo Hoo.

Next week: PICTURE WEEK!

*After a week of no walking, eating crap (Nachos! Beer! Pizza! Beer! Lasagne! Beer! Arbys!) I should be pleased that I only gained one pound. However, in order to make my 1 lb per week goal for January I need to lose 3.4 lbs this week. Ooops, Can't subtract apparently. I only need to lose 2.4 lbs. That's a little more doable.

**I'm determined to do this. I'm tired of looking in the mirror and not being happy with what I see. I want to ride this year and not look at show pictures and focus totally on my big fat beige covered thighs. I just want to be a little happier with myself.

***I shan't be too discouraged because really, back at the beginning of December, I was a full 5 lbs more heavy than my January start weight. Yay me!

Snakes in my dreams

I have recurring nightmares. They always have snakes and they always leave me wide awake with my heart pounding and my breathing fast.

I am scared of snakes. I am so scared of snakes that even the thought of them makes my heart beat faster and makes me feel anxious. Like right now. Slow down heart, there's no snakes here.

Those snakes are a big part of my insomnia. It seems like when I feel stressed or upset, or even just a little off, those slithery, green, legless serpents wiggle their creepy little ways into my sleepy mind.

Usually, they aren't even scary snakes. Usually, they might even seem a bit cute to someone who's not me. They're little and bright green and have big eyes. There's a few of them and they just sway there in front of me. Not threatening, not hurting. Just there, swaying back and forth. But that's enough to keep me awake for the rest of the night. Sometimes, I feel bad that I am so frightened of them.

Last night, it was different. Last night, they looked different. Last night, they chased me. Around and around and around the house. Last night they attacked me with their pointy, sharp fangs. Last night, it was more than quick breathing and pounding heart.

Last night, I woke myself up screaming.

Embarrassing Weigh-in: Week #3

Date: January 18, 2007
Weight: 150.4 lbs (-2.6 total lbs)

** We're back on track! (Ahead of the game even)

Hockey=Crazy

It's not normal for me to act in a crazy or impulsive way. I'm pretty reserved generally and I'm not much into doing nutty things spontaneously.

However, the girls at hockey inspire me to be nothing like me normal self. Last night after our game we were sitting around having a couple beers. I scored another goal, which means I deserve a beer. Yes. Deserve one! Anyways, one of the girls just bought a snowboard and wanted to try it out. (It's 11 at night by this time).

So, what do we do? We head home, get all dressed up in our snow clothes (it was -21 Celsius last night) and went boarding up at the golf course. The snow sucked, it was too cold and too sticky to slide really well on, but we got some good pictures.

I'm not sure it's a good idea to stay out until 2 am, snowboarding the golf course, on a work night. 6:30 came awfully early this morning.

The Hip!!!!

The best band ever was in town last night and we had PRIME seats in the almost sold out arena... Row 6!


The Tragically Hip is one of the premier Canadian bands. They have a unique sound and their songs are all sorts of Canadian from hockey to snow to obscure little prarie towns. They're loved by (almost) all Canadians from young to old, by the looks of the crowd last night. They played lots of their old stuff and some from their newest album too. It was the old ones the crowd loved though. They had the crowd screaming with Fully Completely, swaying along to Long Time Running and everyone, EVERYONE, singing along with my ALL time favorite Hip song, Wheatkings.


It was amazing. I took some really sucky camera phone pics in which you can't see anything except for spotlights, but whatever. I know what they are.

Embarrassing Weigh-In - Week #2

Date: January 11, 2007
Weight: 152.2 (-0.8 lbs)

*As an aside... I was surprisingly anxious to get on the scale this morning. I'm not sure why. Anyways, I didn't make my 1 lb/week goal this week. I came close though, which is good considering my dinners this week were less than stellar. (Spaghetti & Meatballs, movie popcorn, and last night... chicken fingers, fries and beer). I suppose I should just be happy I'm not up a few lbs!

** Aside #2... Considering I was on the scale already this morning, I decided to weigh the cats. The big guy... 21.1 lbs!!!! And the little cat was 7.2 lbs. She's growing up fast!

***Aside #3... I decided to only do pictures once a month - I don't think there is going to be dramatic difference in 0.8 lbs.

Now more 2006... will it ever end?

2006 was one of those years that you're glad is over, but at the same time so many things happened that you don't really want to remember, but you don't really want to forget either so I'm kind of going to do a year in review sort of thingy. Here goes....

JANUARY

Hockey, Hockey, Hockey and more hockey! The Lightning had a blast at tournament even though it ended with me and a horrible sinus infection, and the start of W.'s lung thing. Alos, I think that was the month where W. lost his Grandma and a favorite cousin all in one week. It was a great month and a horrible month all in one. Dad and Grandma both had birthdays.

FEBRUARY

I turned the big 30 with a great birthday party planned for me by my fave cousin! Played a lot more hockey and tried to get over that nasty infection.

MARCH

I got to play in the Masters tournament! Fun, fun, fun. We only won one game but we had a good time. W. had his work hockey tournament and we BOUGHT OUR HOUSE!!!! It was still just a hole in the ground, but it was our hole in the ground! A stressful couple of days and some quick decisions but so exciting! Went to the CMHA convention in Edmonton - a fun ladies road trip and a very horsey weekend.

APRIL

April was Grandpa's birthday party and that's about it. I think that we just watched the house grow and started riding.

MAY

VEGAS BABY! W. and I headed for Las Vegas for the first time with his hockey team. We had a blast! It was our only holiday of the year and we made the most of it. May was also Mom's birthday.

JUNE

June brought our annual Ladies Clinic - riding, friends, food and wine! A great time for all. June was also W.'s 30th Birthday. We had a big party for him in his parents backyard and he played some ball that weekend too.

JULY

This was the month where W's lung problems escalated. We spent some time in a few different hospitals for tests. We also managed to get in a nice weekend of camping, just the two of us too. We found out that W. has cancer and that he's going to need surgery soon.

AUGUST

We headed down to Washington State for the C-Fair horse show, which was a blast! It was a little stressful being so far away and not knowing if W. was going to have to go for surgery right away. This was the only show I made it to this year, and it was a good one. We place in 4 of 6 classes and won one! Our first US show was a success! The rest of the month was a lot of waiting and wondering when W would have the surgery. We were also trying to find out whether we could move into the new place a month early. We also lost Tucker in August which made a very sucky month even sadder.

SEPTEMBER

Sept 1 was W.s surgery. He had 2/3 of his right lung removed and was in the hospital for 8 days. It was a pretty stressful time, but they got all the tumor out and it hadn't spread at all, so he pulled through really well. He was off work for the rest of September, recovering at home. He's doing awsome now - no remaining effects at all! September was also the start of a new season of hockey for me, and for our local CHL team. We have season tickets and go to all the games. This was also our 2nd wedding anniversary.

OCTOBER

We moved in at the end of this month! October was full of house stuff, furniture buying and meeting with lawyers etc. W. started back to work 1/2 time in the middle of the month and did well. We had a big moving party and were in the new house all in one day! It's gorgeous and wonderful and we are so happy there! Our Alberta friends were in town and we did a beautiful fall trail ride.

NOVEMBER

W. is back to work full time and hockey carries on. November was a busy month for me at work. W. starts playing hockey again! Things are right back to normal now. I played a lot of hockey and we had a tournament and the first Christmas event! I love Christmas! We also found our new kitten this month! She's made herself at home with us and we love her!

DECEMBER

More hockey, Christmas decorating and shopping filled December. W. lost another family member this month, one of his close Aunts passed away suddenly. I got stuck out of town for work due to some crazy wind and snow and wasn't able to get home for the service. We had a great Christmas with all of our families and had a well deserved week off between Christmas and New Years. Not enough time though! We need a vacation!!!

So that's 2006. Here's to hoping for a happy, healthy and fun 2007!

Hey! Look over there!!

Ok, it was time to get that last post off the top of the page. No one needs to look at that for very long! So today I'm just going to mention a bunch of random items.

Random Item #1: Go Canada Go!!!!! I was fortunate enough to have Friday off work to watch our awesome Canadian boys win the World Junior U20 Hockey Championship for the THIRD year in a row. There is nothing that makes me feel emotional faster than watching an amazing athletic effort pay off. The celebratory pile-up on the goalie at the end of the game? Guaranteed to bring a tear to my eye. Congratulations boys!

Random Item #2: Our oldest horse, R., has been having a tough couple of weeks and there was a day or two there where we thought we were going to lose her to laminitis. But! She's feeling much better and our vet says she should make a full recovery - there was no rotation in her cannon bones, so once the inflammation is gone she should be fully sound again. Yay!

Random Item #3: My house is soooo boring! I put off doing any decorating after we moved in because it was so close to Christmas. I put away the Christmas decorations last week and now it is bare, blank, boring. No pictures on the walls, nothing. I don't even have many ideas for how I'm going to decorate, so I guess it's boring house for a while more.

Random Item #4: The Tragically Hip! This Week! Here, In town! A favorite of lots and lots of Canadians and I can't wait to see them again.

I seem to be out of randomness for now.

Embarrassing Weigh In #1

Date: January 4, 2007
Weight: 153 lbs

Blah Blah Blah, Diet Blog, Blah Blah

Yeah, I know. How boring is this - I'm going on a diet and I'm gonna write it all down right here for you, the internet's, reading enjoyment. What? Where are you going? There's going to be pictures and everything! Ok. I know. Who wants to read about someone else's diet. Snorefest 2007 right here.

So here is the deal. Right now, today, I weigh 153 lbs. My goal? By March 31, 2007 I will lose 13 lbs (or more!!! Wishful thinking ha ha ha) and get myself down to 140 lbs. I think that's a pretty reasonable goal.

From today on, each Thursday is DIET DAY!!! Woo!!! My very own embarrass myself weigh in for all you pretty Internet people (oh I know, there's no one reading me yet...) every Thursday. Complete with flattering pictures of myself in really, really, really sexy grey sweatpants and a white tank top. Mmm Mmm.... the googlers are coming!


Ok. So starting now. Next post! Embarrassing Weigh-in #1......

2007

So 2006 is finally over! I am so incredibly glad to finally be in 2007 it feels like a huge weight has been lifted.

2006 for me was a year of tragedy, stress and worry. There were highlights, of course, buying and then finally moving into our new house, crossing the border to show at C-Fair in Monroe (and winning a class! Yay!), W's clean bill of health. But the bad outweighed the good this year.

I'm really ready for a good year. I'm ready for some fun, I'm ready for some change and I'm just ready to leave 2006 behind.

Welcome 2007! May this be the best year yet!!

2006

I borrowed this meme from All & Sundry after reading her last year and this year.

1. What did you do in 2006 that you’d never done before?
Bought and moved into a brand new house

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
I don't really remember if I made resolutions last year, but this year I will make more. (Lose weight, fix our finances, keep up this journal and keep my bedroom clean)

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
My best friend gave birth to a lovely baby girl in June

4. Did anyone close to you die?
Too many this year. W.'s grandma died in January, then his cousin a week later. Tucker died in August and then just a few weeks ago W.'s Aunt died. Wish us luck for a less tramatic 2007.

5. What countries did you visit?
Canada and the USA

6. What would you like to have in 2007 that you lacked in 2006?
Less debt and a new truck (hmm. Oxymorons there...)

7. What dates from 2006 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
September 1st was the day that W. had his (Successful!) cancer surgery
OCtober 29 was the day we moved into our new home

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Finally becoming a homeowner

9. What was your biggest failure?
Wasting too much money

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
I had the sinus infection from hell in January and have suffered from my slipped disk all year

11. What was the best thing you bought?
Our house by far!!!

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
W dealt with his illness and family tragedies in a very strong and brave way

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
My own at times

14. Where did most of your money go?
Mostly into things for the house, and far too much went to waste

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Again, the new house, my first show in the US and winning Road Hack!!

16. What song will always remind you of 2006?
There isn't really one song that comes to mind.

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
a) happier or sadder? happier 
b) thinner or fatter? fatter unfortunatley 
c) richer or poorer? Poorer by far

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?
Travelling

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?
Eating and spending money

20. How will you be spending Christmas?
We spent Christmas Eve with my dad's family, Christmas Day with my Mom's family and Boxing Day with W's family

21. Did you fall in love in 2006?
I fell in love with our new adopt-a-kitten

22. How many one-night stands?
Zero, Zilch, None. I'm an old married woman now

23. What was your favorite TV program?
Oh, there are so many.... Survivor, Amazing Race, Prison Break, House, Bones, Canadian/American Idol, Gilmore Girls

24. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
Nope, I don't think I'm a hater

25. What was the best book you read?
My goodness.. to remember just one of the many, many books that I read. I think that it would have to be gods In Alabama/Between, Geogia by Joshilyn Jackson. A new author that I'd never read before and loved!

26. What was your greatest musical discovery?
The Aimee Mann Christmas album (I know... lame to pick a Christmas one, but it led me to her music)

27. What did you want and get?
The new house...

28. What did you want and not get?
A new truck

29. What was your favorite film of this year?
I just saw The Black Dahlia the other night and it was awfully good

30. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
My favorite cousin made a big family birthday party for me at a lovely restaurant, and, I had a nice quiet dinner at home for my BIG 30th BIRTHDAY!

31. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
If W. hadn't been sick

32. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2006?
Jeans, jeans, more jeans and tank tops. Jeans and racer back tank tops.

33. What kept you
My horse and riding

34. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Booth from Bones

35. What political issue stirred you the most?
I try to stay away from the politicalness of everything, but I wasn't real please with the outcome of the federal election

36. Who did you miss?
I will always and forever miss Papa. Also my Angel and Mac, and Tucker.

37. Who was the best new person you met?
My hockey girls!

38. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2006.
That being strong in crisis makes it so much easier to bear

39. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.
Again, nothing comes to mind. The sentance that sums up my year... I'm so glad it's over.

Happy New Year to all!